Here’s the scoop. A gaggle of Catholic mothers who are artisans have joined together to sell their goods on an instagram account called “Zelieandco” after the wonderful Saint Zelie under the blessing of her handiwork.
They offer one day flash sales every week, Tuesdays from 10CST til midnight. Their products are specially priced for Zelie customers and include free shipping.
This Tuesday, aka Mardi Gras, aka February 9th, the lovely ladies of Zelie and Co are teaming up to auction their artisanal handiwork with all proceeds going to charity. And not to brag or anything, but while I love all the ladies who craft there, Nell might be my particular favorite because she’s 1. the cheerleader of the internet and 2. got baby fever? The only solution is Nell’s baby leggings.
The mission of Zelieandco, aside from getting beautiful goods into your hands, is to spread devotion to Saint Zelie and greater awareness about her amazing work as a mother and artisan. Nell’s work can be found under the “whole parenting goods” tab on her blog, Whole Parenting Family, and on instagram as @whole_parenting.
She’s offering a triple-layered organic golden horse blanket with organic cotton batting and heavy organic cotton flannel on the back, a contoured burp cloth in triple organic cotton as well and a bandit bib in the same, and organic cotton leggings in 0-6 months in light green vines. Value: $125.
And the best part? All proceeds from Nell’s offerings in Tuesday’s sale go to a charity near and dear to my heart: Abby Johnson’s “And Then There Were None” ministry.
Kathryn the great agreed to grace this space with her presence once again, and for a piece that I wouldn’t have even thought of because…cradle Catholic. I love her perspective on Advent from a Catholic convert’s point of view. And you will too. (and I’m sorry this is posting a day later than I intended, but the respiratory plague of 2015 got me like horrified-face-emoji.)
Oh, and p.s. – I want to be a special child in her life. Because click over and check out the swank Star Wars soiree she threw for a very deserving little boy earlier this fall. Oh em gee the droid cookies alone….(T-minus 48 hours till I lay my peepers on The Force Awakens. But who’s counting?)
Can I be honest with y’all?
Social media made me do it. Advent, that is.
You see, nineteen years ago I converted to Catholicism. You know, back when social media and iPhones didn’t exist. Weird, isn’t it?
I heard of a few Advent traditions once I stepped foot into a Catholic church, but my sum total take away from the many years of going to Mass was I really needed to buy three purple candles and one pink one to call myself a Catholic. My, my how far I’ve really come.
Now, as a Catholic convert and mom of six, my husband and I celebrate the Advent season with purpose, with love and with a whole lot of Clorox wipes. Because, kids.
During my growing up years, Christmas was shopping, the Christmas Eve service, pajamas the night before Santa came, decorating the house right after Thanksgiving dinner and putting up outdoor lights, pictures with Santa and a nativity scene. Oh, and I’m almost certain there was a Griswold Family Christmas showing in there, too. There was no Jesse Tree, no Advent calendar, no special Advent vs. Christmas songs, no absent baby Jesus’ until Christmas Eve, no Epiphany, no feast of St. Nicholas.
But, you want to know my other confession?
I didn’t get from there, to here, overnight.
Our first Christmas as married Catholics included attending Christmas Eve Mass, then coming home to a wonderful dinner and opening up our one Christmas present (quite poor graduate students back then) before loading up the pickup and driving 15 hours in winter weather from Iowa to Texas to visit family back home. There were no special prayers, no feast of the three kings, no hullaballoo. And you know what? That’s okay, because it was the season we were in back then.
Today? Today, we have added bits and bobs throughout the years. Some we’ve taken away. But most of all, we’ve learned to love. All those traditions have taught us to do the one thing.
Love Jesus more.
Our mantle is adorned with stockings. Yes, our household celebrates both the Feast of St. Nick on December 6 and dear old Santa Claus on December 25 (one in the same, here). But, there’s a twist. St. Nick and Santa just bring fun little things—Christmas pajamas, some gold coins, a Christmas book or two, a family game and small little gifts. The big ones, the gifts our kids most desire, come from us. We do the “three gifts” in honor of the three kings. “Gold” is the gift they really want, “frankincense” is a gift for the body and “myrrh” is a religious gift.
We have many nativity scenes, but none contain Baby Jesus. At least not until Christmas Eve when we race home after Mass and place him back where He belongs. A parent usually reads the Christmas story from the Bible, too.
Before ripping into gifts, we pray over them first—for the people that made them, gave them and those that go without.
Service is a big part of our Advent preparations. Our family volunteers with Brown Santa, a project of the Travis County Sheriff’s Department, that provides a Christmas for families in need. Our children wrap the presents and place them, with great joy, in the boxes to be delivered. And, we either adopt a family or send anonymous gifts to those we know are in need.
Christmas cards are kind of a big deal at our house. I’m a graphic designer, so creating them is great fun. The kids join in the “assembly line” to mail them out, but our greatest joy? Receiving them in the mail. We keep the cards all year and pull one out each evening to re-read and then pray over that family. We love having so many gracious guests join us at dinner each night. There may, or may not, be elbows thrown as the kids “select” a card.
Family time is a priority, but it’s rarely picture perfect. There is hot chocolate making, “It’s a Wonderful Life” movie watching, confession giving, Christmas light oohing and ahhing and Nutcracker ballet watching. It’s all meant to get us to focus internally, on our family unit. There’s almost always a timeout, a little drama and some spilled hot chocolate. But, when we look back I’m always grateful we made the effort. It might not be pretty, but we keep at it.
Decking the halls is one of my favorite parts. Some years, we’ve put it all up right after Thanksgiving dinner, but in recent years, we’ve been taking our time to pull it all out, knowing that we’ll leave it up a bit longer. We always shoot for Epiphany but sometimes the tree becomes a fire hazard. And, safety first. We used to have this elaborate hunt for the Christmas tree, but our favorite farm closed, so now we just go to the local HEB grocery store #lame. But, BUT, the joy is still there. I’m counting that as a win.
After 19 years, we finally have a Jesse Tree! Y’all, I swore I was going to stitch these kick-tail ornaments. But, every year December would roll around and I would pledge, “next year!” And then Small Business Saturday happened this year and I said to myself, “Order it on Etsy.” And I did. We love our ornaments and the kids are really digging the new tradition. Old dog can learn new tricks. I’m proof.
If Rome wasn’t built in a day, then neither was the Whitaker celebration of Advent. I bet yours won’t be either. I’m off to fish the Jesse Tree ornament out of my 19-month-old’s mouth and pray she doesn’t pull down the live tree. Happy Advent, y’all!
When Bonnie’s guest contribution for my little Advent series hit my inbox I breathed a sigh of relief. Because even though I’m blessed to be postpartum this Christmas season and not 38 weeks beautifully pregnant like she is, I’m still kind of a hot mess. This week, particularly, with 3 out of 4 kids crouping up the joint and waking at all hours of the night wanting to practice their seal calls and spend a little me-time in the bathtub sauna. Olaf was right about summer.
But sweet Bonnie, she wrote just what I needed to read. Maybe some of you do, too.
(God bless steroids and Netflix. The end.)
When Jenny asked me to share with her lovely readers about the traditions and decorations and incredibly well-though-out reasons behind them that help define Advent in our home I thought, “I’ve got this.”
Here’s the truth: I don’t.
I sit here 38 weeks pregnant and having contractions. I have pain in my my SI joints that is so bad I sometimes cannot move and usually walk like a zombie. I can fall asleep on the sofa at any time of day. Dinner tonight may possibly be cold cereal.
The plans I had for this year’s fall and winter have all pretty much been laid aside for the advent of the baby in my womb. Even the things three weeks ago I thought we’d be able to pull off have fallen to the wayside.
For sure we’d still be able to cut down a Christmas tree on Guadete Sunday… or not.
For sure I’d be able to make the St. Lucy rolls and share them with my friend’s family who just had a Lucy of their own… or not.
For sure my eldest child and I would be able to do the Jesse Tree together, reading the Scripture and discussing the meaning… or not.
For sure I could at least sit with my kids and re-enact the nativity story with them using our toy nativity…. or not.
But all of that is okay. This Advent we’re doing what we can do and the little things still matter and still make a difference. This year’s Advent is different than last year’s, just as they will each probably vary for us. Our little traditions don’t make or break the holiday season and since I’m not the liturgical living police I’m not gonna sweat what we have not accomplished this year.
But because this is a peek about what we are doing to keep Advent in our home I’ll show you what we have accomplished.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care and St. Nick filled them on the eve of his feast day.
Also, the “Dad Zone” was marked out on the carpet.
Our nativities were set up (we have 4, two of which are kid-friendly). The “grown up” nativities are empty, waiting for the Holy Family to arrive.
Holy Mary, St. Joseph, and their donkey always hang out on the Advent wreath until December 24th. We have lit the candles almost every night at dinner, singing “O Come, O Come, O Come-O” as my three year old calls it. Then ensures a lively discussion of who got to blow out the candles last and whose turn it is this night. No child has been burnt and the two year old’s hair was only slightly singed, once.
The Wise Men are on the bookshelf, way off in the Far East, aka: the far side of the living room. After Christmas they’ll move to the Advent Wreath, where we’ll have a white Christmas candle for the kids to fight over.
My living room’s gallery has a couple of items that change for each season: the “chalk board” (actually foam board and white paint pen) and the Audrey Eclectic artwork.
The kids art gallery (rope + clothespins attached to the wall) was cleared of all Thanksgiving artwork to make room for the Christmas projects. The Jesse Tree has a few more ornaments (colored and hung by my oldest) but then that petered out. But it still looks nice next to the nativity, which the kids do play with, even if we don’t have theological conversations about it.
And while we didn’t actually cut down the tree on the Third Sunday of Advent, we did drive to a tree place in the steady rain. I sat in the minivan with the little kids while my husband bought a pre-cut one and tied it to the top of the vehicle with the help of our 6 year old (it was adorable). It stands, sorta majestically, in the corner of our living room with a crooked star and most of the decorations on the top half.
It took our family a few years to find which Advent traditions work best for us, but even those still fluctuate a bit. At this point, St. Nick filling stockings for his feast day (and no Santa at Christmas) works well for us – making it easier for me and my husband to teach about a saint and generosity while keeping the emphasis a bit more on Mass and Christ than on the presents. Having the nativities out but waiting for Christmas and Epiphany to move all the figures to the stable is a fun way for the kids to interact with the nativity story and they serve as aides in my personal prayer life as well. Getting the tree, cranking up the Christmas music, and busting out any remaining decorations on Rejoice! Sunday helps my family to actually rejoice.
All together, doing Advent the way we do makes it feels like our home is preparing a bit more each week for Christ’s birth. It’s like nesting, but for the Infant Christ.
Delighted to be featuring the beautiful and talented cheerleader of the internet today: Nell O’Leary, one of the heavy lifters behind the beautiful ministry Blessed is She and an attorney-turned-textile-crafter with 3 little people running around her big old hundred year old home. I dare you to look at the wood paneling in her Dining Room (I aspire to one day have rooms in my home which will be capitalized when spoken of) and not swoon.)
Advent and Christmas living in my ancestral home means times of family memories. Many years ago when my husband and I bought my family’s home, I knew with great certitude that holidays would be especially evocative of my own childhood holidays: same cast of characters (plus a few new ones) and same set. Our home is 101 years this year and it jumps for joy when we bring that Christmas tree in the door on Gaudete Sunday because merriment is what a big old house like this was made for.
In the Library, we set up the alabaster creche scene my parents bought when they first purchased the house back in the 70’s. My mom and her mother fell in love with it at the local Catholic goods store, and really made the reach to purchase them as they captured my mom’s heart! For almost 40 years, it has sat here on the wooden radiator cover. As you can see, baby Jesus gets ye-old-napkin treatment until Christmas Eve. Also, Joseph’s hand is removable. That means sometimes it gets perniciously removed by small children and hidden.
The stockings are hung by the chimney with care in hopes that the rail holding them doesn’t break.
In the Entrance Hall, we hang the mistletoe from my childhood along with red ribbons with the Christmas cards pinned on them, dropping down and waiting to be yanked by small hands.
The Dining Room has a really understated character, quietly waiting for our big old Christmas feast! I try to serve a few meals in there during Advent to prepare ye the way of dining room manners. Also, singing O Come O Come Emmanuel with the lights off around a lit wreath in this room is pretty amazing for the kids.
This old beauty from my mom’s teaching years sits on a silver tray with a few pine cones from the papal gardens my mom snagged in the early 90’s. Don’t prosecute, please.
Best of all, the Music Room houses the tree. Each year as children, when my dad dragged the tree in the front door was a time of merriment, chaos, and fighting over who got to hang what. We all had our own boxes of ornaments and could hang them wherever we liked, but the candy canes and lights were a dueling matter. Our three little kiddos have been dying to decorate and really usher in this time of Advent in a more physical way with the tree. It seems to bring the reason for Christmas alive a little extra for them.
As my family all gathers around for the last bit of Advent (both out of town siblings come in town with families!) before Christmas, my hope is, that like when we were kids, we can feel that joy and anticipation of the Christ Child (not just the presents, okay, a little for the presents too), and know we are loved, unequivocally loved by God!
Nell is a recovering lawyer married to her law school love who blogs and sews to stay sane while at home with her three little kids.
Today’s guest contributor is a woman whose Instagram feed I’ve stalk-mired for the past couple years, and wouldn’t you know it? She’s a real life friend of one of my very best friends from college. Her interior decorating services make my HGTV-loving heart pitter patter, but it’s the intentionality and joy she puts into her own home that I like best of all. My only critique? If I set up the swoon-worthy hot chocolate station she has assembled for her crew of 7 beautiful babies, my 5 year old sugar addict would be strung out round the clock. I really think I’d find him doing lines of cocoa at 3 am when the baby wakes me for a nightcap. But I digress. Welcome, Jen!
Thank you Jenny, for inviting me! It’s a real labor of love for me to create a home that is magical, memorable, and faith-filled for my family … and to share it with you all of course too!
So how do I deck my halls? To be honest before I ever deck, I do some planning.
When I go about transforming my home in preparation for Christ’s birth, I first ask myself, “How will this vignette or space bring meaning to my children’s Advent/Christmas?” It could be anything from the beauty of the lights to the joy of the taste. My aim is to always honor God and give Him the glory in what I create and to point my children to do the same.
I hope you find inspiration in my answers and the corresponding pictures.
**Oh, and be sure to read all the way to the end to participate in a Giveaway that could transform your New Year!!!**
This year I decorated different. I mean way different. I simplified. Normally, I have 2 trees (one I get crazy decorative with–meaning no kids allowed, and one I spruce up after the kids add all their ornamentation). This year I concentrated on the vignettes and I’m letting the tree be beautiful without redoing how the kids adorned it. I mean why? Trees really are beautiful no matter what. Here’s what I did add to the tree though that has made the sentimentality of the children’s work all the more special–I moved our everyday religious statues next to the tree.
That blue light is lit for my hubby who works every Christmas. Boo!
Where’s St. Joseph? Umm, yeah, he didn’t make the photography shoot! But trust me when I say he’s on the otherside of the tree! That guy is so humble! No?
Once I added Mary next to the tree, it got me thinking about a good spot for my DIY Marian Garland (which incidentally was a big hit on Instagram, for me anyway. Like the most Likes ever. Who knew?) And yes, actually, I am a valley girl. I was born and raised in the smog pit capital of the world, So. Cal!
And what Christian home wouldn’t be complete without the Advent wreath. Now here is where I divulge a few of my decorating confessions, *please don’t judge*.
First, pink and purple are, ahem, not my favorite colors. While, I love their symbolism, I always feel in a bit of a pickle about how to incorporate them stylishly with the rest of my décor. I know. It seems petty but that’s why it’s a confession.
Second, I never know where to put it. The wreath that is. I want it on the kitchen table but I don’t want my toddler eating the wax or breaking the sticks either. It takes up quite a bit of center mass too so there are not a lot of options on other table tops… and again the toddler, anyways.
Sooo, I am excited to say that because we moved the Christmas tree to the sunroom this year (forgot to mention that earlier), it opened up a space on the buffet that I moved in order for the tree to fit. All of a sudden with Mary making her presence, the Advent wreath blended seamlessly into the vignette and then it just got even better when I decided to turn the whole buffet into Catholic Central!
In came the nativity and my Mary and Baby Jesus art and those cute little wooden saints dolls my sister-in-law made for us. And voila!?
Really, the saints dolls beg for discussion with the littles as they stand around the nativity. These holy heroes who gave their whole lives over to Christ. They stand in awe and reverence of Him just as we should!
As a child, I had never heard of the Jesse Tree and frankly it wasn’t until I came back to my Catholic roots that I thought to even care. Now, I can’t imagine Advent without it.
Here again, my sister-in-law (Best Gift Giver Ever) made by hand each little ornament that we hang every night. The little girls take turns finding the right number (which will soon get hard since the oldest of the littles is 4) and hanging it on our DIY advent tree. My husband and I made this last year from Pinterest inspiration and Ikea wood scraps. It hangs right near our kitchen table so we remember to do it after dinner and then we sing, O Come, O Come, Emmanuel!
I throw my hands up in praise and worship at, “Rejoice, Rejoice…!” The girls go crazy for it!
One of the fun parts about decorating for Advent is also recognizing that it’s Winter; this means, “Baby It’s Cold Outside!” Since my kids are avid sledders, and sidewalk shovelers…wink, I’ve got them covered with ye olde coffee (I wish), I mean cocoa station. I adorned it with salivating chocolates and cookies, because well, they just go hand in hand. Don’t you think?
Seriously though, the cookies and chocolates are really a nod at my grandmother who always had her Sicilian cookies on the coffee table all Advent long. It left in impression with me: one of family, warmth, innocence, safety. I was at home when I was there. I want that for my kids now, especially in this crazy day and age. Because we are their temporary home. It’s that glimpse of their home to come and the banquet which they will partake in. I know it may not be “penitential” but I rather look at it as, “Taste and see the goodness of the Lord.”
OK, don’t laugh! I am not my Sicilian grandmother. But who doesn’t love Reeses!
And Salted Caramel from Tuesday Morning : )
And Christmas tree cookies from Food Lion. Just keepin it real!
My 11 year old letterer was honing his skills on this one. Not bad though!
And last but not least a little Santa swag. My aim was to create the excitement and the anticipation that I enjoy of the Santa lure. This is really all we have though and it’s simply a sign I picked up at Home Goods last year that has a slot for the children to write letters to Santa. The overall tablescape is one of antiquated, nostalgia with the vintage faux candlestick and books. It’s just a beautiful scene for the children to walk down the stairs and see.
By the way, did you hear me talk with Jennifer Fulwiler on her Sirius XM radio show? We talked about beauty; how it is neither rich nor poor. It is. Beauty is an attribute of God, therefore we take pleasure in beauty for beauty’s sake but also because it points to the Creator.
Now, go and make beautiful things, and scenes, and vignettes in your home. Show God to the world through that beauty.
And last but not least… if you struggle putting those above words into action…and some of you really will…and that’s ok… I have a Giveaway you’ll absolutely love, cause you read till the end and that’s all that matters!
What is an eDesign, anyways?
eDesign is a fabulous way to have an In-Home Design Consultation for a fraction of the cost–in this case Free! Hey, Merry Christmas!!! **Shameless plug, it makes for a great holiday gift certificate… I’m just saying**
How does it work?
If you remember my post with Melody, from Blossoming Joy, I showed you how we skyped for about an hour while she took me through her master bedroom and just asked me question after question about what to do, what to hang, this color, that pillow, etc, etc. Then I sent her a write up of the conversation. She implemented nearly everything I suggested.
We had a lot of fun as our kiddos kept popping their heads in and then someone started screaming! At any rate, she posted her “after” pictures from her eDesign and they turned out so wonderful.
Who will get chosen?
If you’d like to enter into a chance to win the eDesign with me just tell me in the comment section why your space needs an interior decorator and why it’s so important to you! I will choose the winner based on your well-crafted answer. Thank you and best of luck!
Maybe you’re already reading Deme over at House for Five (six now, actually!) and so maybe it’s old news to you that she is the most phenomenal DIY queen, and that her ability to whip up beautiful rooms using thrifted or already-in-your-home-but-not-in-the-right-space pieces is sort of mind blowing.
And if you’re not? Well then it’s your lucky day. She’s here to tell a tale of contentment, of gratitude, and of loving the house you’re currently living in, not because it’s perfect, but because it’s home.
(Not pictured: sweet baby O, the newest addition.)
As someone who blogs about DIY and putting a personal stamp on our family’s newish-to-us house, I could talk about homes all day. Paint colors, furniture layouts, avoiding window cleaning…it’s just part of my genetic makeup. I can’t not think about that stuff.
But I get that not everyone finds the same thrills in slapping color on their walls and hacking up duvet covers to make curtains panels. Your home might even drive you crazy. Or you may love it. Either way, if you have a home, you happen to have one of the most incredible gifts and a powerful tool.
Growing up my mom worked as a bookkeeper for an interior designer. She would often bring home his discontinued books of wallpaper samples and catalogs. I would pour over them, dreaming up ways to use them and how they would look in different rooms in the house. I watched my parents slowly turn our childhood home into a place that suited our family….painting, carpeting, building……I loved watching it happen, and especially loved when they let my brother and I jump in on the design choices.
Looking back I didn’t realize just how much they passed on the budget conscious DIY bug that would eventually take over my own home.
I distinctly remember my dad’s football players coming over to tear up concrete in exchange for pizza and a good workout when it was time to break ground for our big family room addition. And a family friend doing days of electrical work.
That addition was years in the making.
Prior to that, the only place to gather was our very small kitchen and equally “cozy” living room. My dad would pack his athletes in like sardines to watch game film on weekends, and then host Bible studies during the week. They dreamed of a bigger space to invite friends, family, and young people to gather. And eventually they built that dream into reality.
The huge open family room welcomed youth groups for game nights and sports teams for celebrating. It hosted wedding showers and surprise anniversary parties. It was the hot spot for many a Superbowl, where we cleared out the furniture and had friends come bearing food and lawn chairs to accommodate everyone. It’s where we gathered after holiday meals and where our family regrouped after long days of work and school. It’s where we sat soaking up the words of C.S. Lewis and Tolkien as my dad read aloud to us as kids.
My favorite memory is the fireplace hearth that became a sort of podium*. If someone was having a bad day, they stood on the hearth and vented their stresses. If someone had something important to say, they announced it standing on the hearth. It sounds weird now that I’ve typed it, but it really was the best. So many times we ended in hysterical laughter, even after tears.
All those things happened in that great big dream-turned-reality room. But here’s the thing – they were happening before that large gathering space ever existed. My parents’ doors were open when their living space was just teeny-tiny. The invitation for people to gather in our home was always extended, even before all that extra square footage. They didn’t wait. The extra space simply allowed them to expand their hospitality.
You may not live in your dream home, but if you have a home you are way ahead of a huge chunk of the world by way of shelter, running water, and electricity. And if you have a home, you also have an instrument, a tool to extend peace, charity, and hospitality….first to your family and then to your community.
We can wait until we live someplace with a little more space, or until we finish up such and such project, or until we have a table, or whatever. We can wait to love our homes and invite others in, but what if it’s years before those things happen…what if they don’t happen at all? How much time will we have wasted? How much will we have missed?
In our last house we took on a pretty large DIY effort in attempts to turn our dated kitchen into less of a brown cave. We took it from this….
….to this:
But it took almost a year for Procrastinator Pants here to get it done. Which means for the majority of that time it looked like this:
The half-painted, junk exposed, ultra-glamorous in between (and this is “cleaned up”):
Ugly? Yes. But still functional. So, there was no reason we couldn’t have people over, save for my ego.
We hosted play dates, a women’s Bible study, holiday dinners, coaches meetings, and out of town guests while our kitchen was in this mid-reno state. Part of me wanted to just wait until the job was done, but looking back, we would have missed so much.
So, what if we invited people into our homes regardless of their size or the dishes in the sink? What kind of home do you feel comfortable visiting? I know that I’m much more at ease in a home where I feel welcome to plop down on the couch. And that has less to do with coordinated throw pillows and more to do with evidence that a home is actually lived in. Our home’s seeming imperfections really can be an invitation for our guests to be themselves. Size and decor don’t have much to do with creating a beautiful, inviting home (though they can help), but open doors to imperfect, loved in spaces absolutely do.
The way we view our homes can affect how willing we are to share them and how well our family thrives in them. If you’re feeling dissatisfied with your home for whatever reason…..maybe your growing family is making those walls feel a little too tight, or you’re still saving up for furniture, or maybe you’re overwhelmed by maintaining all the space…..there are a few things you can do to help shift your perspective. Over the years, these are a few things that have helped me come back to loving my home, and being willing to share it, just as it is.
The Gratitude List
I’m embarrassed to admit how often I need to do this. A couple years ago we were unexpectedly relocated from New Mexico to Ohio for my husband’s work. We gained some additional living space and four real seasons #glorious. I remember moving into our home and being overwhelmed by God’s goodness and all the possibility swirling around this place. It was a DIY lover’s dream – plenty of opportunity to make the place our own, but totally livable as is. A few months later I caught myself looking around wishing I could change this, and tweak that, and if only _____ were different. Geesh!
If you catch yourself thinking about what needs to change before your home is “right” just grab a notebook and start writing out gratitude. Write down all that you’re thankful for in your home, and in your life. Keep going until contentment returns.
Get Rid Of Crap
If you’re having an internal throw down with the need machine and are feeling that if you just had a few more things then it would all be better, do the very opposite and start purging. I know it seems counter-intuitive, but just do it.
It’s sort of like standing in front of a closet full of “nothing to wear”. When we’ve packed a closet full of cute bargains that don’t really fit and we don’t really love, we have trouble seeing the things we do love and look great on us. We can be convinced that having more things gives us more options, when in reality they stifle creativity and muddy the water. Likewise when our homes are full of nice things that we don’t truly need, use, or love, it makes it harder to see and enjoy the things we do. I promise that you and your home will feel so much lighter if you grab a bag and start tossing.
Clean Something
I would never presume that you need to clean your house. I would probably smack anyone who suggested that I need to clean mine, even if it were true. What I will say is that I cleaned our bedroom the other day (which admittedly involved relocating a few piles into another room to deal with later). And all of a sudden I could breath. The rest of the house was a flipping train wreck, but I found myself wandering into my cleaned up corner throughout the day to just take a deep breath. Because there was actually space to breath and think in there. When my house is out of sorts, my brain usually is too. Which totally reinforces getting rid of the crap and clutter.
Organize It
Can we have an honest moment about messy houses? There is so much pressure to have the ideal picture perfect life (fashion, relationships, home, body, kids, etc), but there’s also those glorious “keeping it real” photos to remind us that notion is unattainable. So, we can bounce back and forth between “Ugh! Nothing is working here, I need a new house.” and “Whew. She just posted a picture of her mountain of laundry taking over her couch. Thank goodness I’m not the only one. I’m letting it all go, baby! And while I’m at it, screw shaving my legs!” Too much? Well, you get the point.
I think it’s important to remember that God is a god of order. While there will be times, and even extended seasons, when the piles are taking over and hot mess doesn’t even begin to describe the destruction, we were not created to thrive in chaos. At some point, it is good for everyone that we restore some order to our homes. It’s good stewardship and good for the soul. We’re not talking pristine, friends, just restored.
Play musical furniture and shop your home
My husband’s personal favorite (not at all, but that’s why there’s beer). Sometimes all it takes to give your house a pick-me-up is to switch things around a bit. Try shifting the furniture layout or move things to different rooms in the house. If you feel like your home is working against you when it comes to function, this is a great way to make a change in how the household runs. Our homes should work hard for us, and if something is not working or making you crazy, don’t be afraid to change it.
Start small
If you’re now in the fetal position after reading these, please don’t be overwhelmed. Our homes come together over time and constantly need to adjust through new seasons of life. They will never be perfect. So, start with one small spot. Clean out the junk drawer or your purse, grab some flowers or branches from the yard and pop them in a vase by the sink, sit with your coffee by your favorite window (ignore the LEGO landmines), maybe even read that gratitude list.
It doesn’t take big efforts to come back to loving your home. And when we see our homes as the gift they are, we can open their doors to bless our communities. Sometimes that looks a family room full of lawn chairs and football jerseys, and sometimes it’s more intimate like tea with a friend. Hospitality isn’t one size or one personality type. That’s the beauty of God’s kingdom – there’s room for Him to move in any sized home and any heart that’s willing to open it’s doors.
Handing the reins over today to the beautiful DIY queen Sheena of Bean in Love, another FUS friend and the mama to 3 lovely little people who are almost always impeccably dressed thanks to mom’s designer’s eye and handiness. (Seriously, check out her IG). Thanks for filling in, Sheena!
Hey all! When Jenny and I were typing/chatting about what I could throw down over here she mentioned maybe writing about how I handle three toddlers (we two 3 year olds and one 1.5 year old) and I gave a hearty laugh-out-loud because, while we are all surviving and it might look like I know how to get things done with three littles underfoot, most days I look like a chicken about to be dinner and in need of a drink. I have zero words of wisdom and truly I think it’s luck that we’re all still sane some days. Okay, so maybe that’s an exaggeration but what I’m really saying is that there are lots more seasoned moms (like Jenny!) who are much more qualified to be giving advice on raising little humans. I can say though that I really love what I do and I wouldn’t have it any other way…except if I was rich maybe I’d hire a mothers’ helper or six.
So anyway, I blog over at Bean in Love about stuff I do and make on a really tight budget.
Sometimes I use free things like leaves from our front yard as decor. And sometimes I use weeds. Yep. Sometimes. Like the time when I needed something “living” to fill a vase near the kitchen sink and I needed it quick before the kids woke up and all my cleaning efforts for the sake of a quality photograph were destroyed.
The weeds:
I expected them to survive the night after the picture was taken and no longer but they survived for over a week. And, and, they mysteriously folded their leaves in at night which was equal parts mystifying, creepy, and uber cool.
Daytime:
Nighttime:
After watching their impressive show for a couple of nights, I went to the all-knowing Google to figure out what exactly these creatures were and found out that they are so called “Chamberbitter”.
Not that you care in the least what they’re called but I just thought I’d share in case you want to go hunt for some Chamberbitter in your own backyard. Though they be but weeds, they are pretty and they’ve got a lot of life in them post-pull.
Kinda like us humans, right? We are but lowly weeds going through life hoping to someday spread our sprigs wide in the paradisiacal garden we know to be heaven.
We’re all different – some are tall, some are short, some produce flowers, some don’t. Some weeds live short lives; others live long lives. They’re hated among gardeners and farmers because they can quickly usurp gardens and fields. They carry with them a stigma because of that reason that they are not wanted, not good enough, not beautiful, not productive, not worthy. They’re not even given the time of day; not gazed upon lovingly, just uprooted and tossed in the burn pile. That’s how we feel we’re treated by the world sometimes, isn’t it? That we’re not good enough. Not good enough to even be given a chance but just tossed aside in favor of something supposedly better and more beautiful.
But we are beautiful, each and every one of us. Regardless of what the world tells us about our qualities and about who we are, we are incredible. As it turns out, this Chamberbitter weed I found in our backyard is actually used medicinally in South America to treat kidney stones. Crazy, huh? Use those God-given talents my friends and keep soaking up the light and grace of the Son and one day God will pluck us from this earth and He’ll put us in our own special vase where our beauty will be on display for all to see. And no one will ever know that we were once lowly weeds.
This pregnancy has been hands down the toughest physically, but only as of about a month ago. If you’d have asked me in the springtime how I was handling quattro bing’s gestation I would have assured you it was no big deal, really. And I would have been telling the truth!
Aside from the endless rounds of sinus woes and bronchitis that seemed to plague much of the northern hemisphere this past winter, I had almost zero pregnancy complaints of the physical variety. I don’t get morning sickness, just a touch of meat aversion, and my 1st and 2nd trimesters were pretty much like “baby? what baby?
I think I even obnoxiously gloated/wondered aloud on FB over having gained only 4 lbs in 19 weeks.
Cackle.
Yeahhhhhhhh.
Suffice it to say things have sped up in both the weight gain department (oh em GGGGGGGGGEEEEE how they’ve sped) and the realm of physical taxation. I grunt when I rise and when I collapse to sleep. I leave things on the floor from time to time because it’s not worth it. I sit constantly, and then I get up because sitting all the time really hurts your back, it turns out. And the 2 miles or so I can limp along on the treadmill some nights actually make me feel so much worse, physically, that my gymtendence has dropped to 2-3 times per week. And that’s with PRIME new episodes all over HGTV, plus free babysitting.
In other words, I’ve arrived, prematurely, at the end of my procreative rope.
Yesterday I wept in a King Sooper’s parking lot, inside the store itself, and then copiously in my bed in a large pile of very, very hot mess which my very, very wonderful husband scooped up with soothing back pats and kleenex.
And there’s a good month and a half till d day. So, why all the complaining? Why am I not offering it all up like a good little soldier?
Well, I’m trying. But I’m also like, there have got to be other women who feel this way. And who are routinely sacrificing what could be precious rest + recharge time in favor of spray painting everything and rearranging the entire house.
So my question to you, gentle reader? Where does the last leg of preg leave you? Limping along armed with a can of Krylon and doing all the home decorating your hefty little heart can handle? Or passed out on the couch under a bag of ice, counting the minutes until bedtime. Or maybe a combo?
Oh, since you didn’t ask, here are some nursery pictures because I’ve been burning what little energy I have during the daylight hours mothering my existing exterior brood, writing, and rehabbing thrifted rejects into a not-quite-but-so-close-to-Pinterest-worthy nursery.
Ready?
Okay, now drop your expectations so they’re commensurate with a $150 budget and a fourth born child who will be arriving into a rental house.
Now are you ready?
K.
First up we have the Shermag glider I snagged from Craig, washed the h out of (even the interior cushions. Stupid. And yet…the stank of an entire bottle of Febreeze doused by the seller has just about abated. So maybe not so stupid?). I paid $100 for it and it’s the dreamiest rocking experience I’ve ever known. I love how high the arms are for maximum nursing support, though I’m strongly tempted to load up on Whole Food’s finest ($10!!) formula and call it a day. Strongly.
See that sweet little rabbit? A gift from my sister in law, newly repatriated from a 3 year stint in Cambodia. Doesn’t he look like a little asian velveteen rabbit?
And the boys surrendered their decoupaged (not by me. So not.) saint dresser which baby will be grateful for, since it’s the ultimate diaper changing station + linen closet + dresser.
Found the deflated Pottery Barn pad cover atop it at Saver’s this week for $1, now I’m just waiting for Amazon to drone me the changing pad itself and we’ll be solid.
Next up? The crib (given to us by another family in our parish small group – so generous and already assembled. Except, um, we had to pretty much dissemble it in the hallway because babe, it will totally fit down the hallway and around that 90 degree corner, let’s just try…at 9 pm on Father’s Day, no less. Wifey of the year up in here.
Cute, huh? I’m telling myself the mismatched wood tones are super chic. And yes the evil drop side, such danger, much reckless. Got it.
The bedding is the same we’ve used for all three kids, purchased by my sweet MIL when Joey was still an unknown gender ? in my womb. And I stole the cute jute rug from Genevieve’s abode.
While this room looks fairly manly, I promise to throw some lavender in there if baby comes out with lady parts, but I’m strongly leaning towards XY right now, and I think it shows in the decor. And in my insatiable weight gain + related cravings for Salsa Verde Doritos dipped in hydrochloric acid.
Moooooving on.
This piano bench? Sewing table? Preschool altar? was $9.99, also at Saver’s, and I was quite taken with its svelte legs and hinged, opening top. I envisioned stashing my phone/kindle/granola bars/prayer materials in there for handy access during nursing sessions. $8 worth of spray paint and some light distressing and it turned out pretty cute, don’t you think?
Last but not least, all your fine recommendations and hearty endorsements convinced me and my aching back that the Maxi Cosi was the way to go, so I’m now the proudest owner of this little black number, which is easily 5 pounds lighter than the Graco dinosaur in our garage.
(On a related note, anyone in Denver want a 3 year old Graco red/grey model with 2 bases? Free to a mediocre home)
And that’s the nursery, in under a thousand words and 10 grainy pictures. I’d still love to put some flowing white drapes up to frame out the skinny window, but other than that I’m supremely satisfied with it and can’t wait to plop a fat baby directly into that crib on our first night home from hotel hospital.
Next on my nesting agenda: attacking baseboards, steam cleaning all the carpets, and keeping a wary eye for anything that looks remotely in need of a fresh coat of spray paint. And maybe a bath.
Last night I officially hung up my speaking hat for the foreseeable future, knocking off my last “public appearance” before baby. Handily, in the humidity of the basement our torrential summer rainfall exiled the crowd to, I looked ready to hit up labor and delivery by the end, so I don’t think any invitations will be forthcoming for the time being. It was an immense privilege to be invited to speak at my own parish, and I think it was my favorite public speaking experience to date.
I’m going to be using the text from last night as a starting point for a week-long series on the hows, whys, and whats surrounding the history and the theology of the Church’s teachings on sex, so tune in on Monday for round one. (I may eventually post the audio of the talk here, too, and the great Q&A session that followed.)
But let’s talk really important stuff now, like how tonight at 6:30 pm a dream 22 years in the making will come true when I settle into my overpriced reclining theater seat for a luxury showing of Jurassic World.
I don’t know about your family of origin, but mine is straight up dino crazy. Jurassic Park is literally a cult classic between the 9 of us, and my adult siblings have been known to hold entire conversations using only dialogue from the film. (I’m sorry for the still-single Senour siblings I just publicly outed. Hopefully your romantic prospects don’t drop off too sharply.)
Suffice it to say we’re a leeetle bit excited to get our paleontology nerd on tonight, and the reviews I’ve read so far are encouraging that this summer blockbuster, with the assistance of one raptor-training Chris Pratt, is finally going to do justice to the cinematic masterpiece that is the original.
I understand if you need to stop reading now. There’s a lot of embarrassing self revelation going on at the moment.
But! Pressing forward, I want to share some tips and tricks that have been absolutely transformative to our home life and for my motherly mental health of late, and they have nothing to do with dinosaurs.
Perhaps you’ve eyed the NYT bestseller list lately, or seen Marie Kondo’s name making the rounds on social media? Her odd, fascinating little book “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” is one of those rare occurrences where the title completely and accurately sums up the content within.
Life changing. Magic. Tidying.
While there is a fair bit of bizarre, Eastern-style anthropomorphism intrinsic to the text (thanking your ratty t-shirts for their service as you trash them, for example), the takeaways from this handy little book have honestly been life changing. And I’ve talked to so many other mom friends who feel similarly.
Her premise is basically thus: If you have something in your home, it should “spark joy,” otherwise it does not have the “right,” if you will, to occupy physical or emotional space in your little world.
My takeaway? Throw out all.the.crap.
Kids’ dishes in a quantity greater than the number of children currently living in this house? Gone.
Next-size-up hand me downs given to us by neighbors, friends, family, etc. but not our taste and not in the greatest shape? Smell ya later. (Literally, in many cases.)
(I’m a firm believer in passing along baby gear as needed, as soon as your present need has abated and you see a friend or sister with their own immediate need. Baby gear is cyclical in nature, and it will always come back to you when you need it. The only things we hang on to between kids are our stroller, high chairs, Ergo, and car seats. Everything else is transient, and meant to be poured out into the great, procreative collective of child rearing. It takes a village, etc.)
Random knickknacks from travel/school/another lifetime? Bye bye.
Clothes which do not currently fit AND will probably either a. never do so again or b. are cheaply made/out of style? To Goodwill you go. (Take heart here, I’m actually giving stuff to charity, not straight up landfilling it.)
Endless piles of paperwork that are either available or already duplicated electronically? C ya. Except for tax documents and the current year’s bills. You can stay. But no more school notices, paid utility receipt stubs, random insurance mailings, etc. Gone. All if it.
Home goods or decor that were never my style to begin with? No more. You don’t deserve to be here if you don’t fit our design aesthetic. I can easily replace you at Saver’s with enough patience and persistence, and I’d rather look at an empty table top or a clean white wall in the meantime. Even if somebody gave it to us. Which was so kind and generous! But it doesn’t mean you have to keep it if it doesn’t work for you.
Since we’re big into thrifting around here, it’s very easy for me to detach from furniture/clothing/toys to begin with, so it has been such a relief to say, actually, you know what? This doesn’t work for us right now, and it’s not “sparking joy” (whatever the hell that means, precisely) and so since I am annoyed and frustrated and harried by its continued occupation in my domicile, I actually do have the right to (literally) kick it to the curb.
Here are some of the upsides that we’ve observed since I read this book early in the Spring:
Fewer toys = happier mommy and more creative and generous children. I would say we’ve gotten rid of 60-70% of our toys, and we didn’t have a ton to begin with. What we kept:
Legos/Duplos
Costumes/dress up clothes
Matchbox cars and ramp
Melissa and Doug train set, latch board, auto carrier with cars, and horse trailer (thank you Grandma and Grandpa!)
Small box of musical instruments
Bikes, chalk, balls, and other outdoor toys
Toy cradle with 2 dolls
Miniature trampoline
Wooden shapes and tray for assembling
Little People nativity set
And that’s it. Seriously. Except for a handful of stuffed animals special to each kid, that’s our entire inventory. There’s no more yelling about cleaning up, nobody feels overwhelmed by the mess in the playroom (including mommy) and everyone is dwelling in increased harmony. It’s amazing. (and yes, I realize as my kids get older they will acquire more crap, and I will have less and less to say about it, but for now I control the inflow and the outflow, and we’re hoping to teach them quality over quantity so that we don’t end up looking like Sid’s backyard in Toy Story.)
Outfits that look good on everybody, all the time.
We’re kind of doing capsule wardrobes, I guess? Mine certainly is, anyway, as I round the bases for home plate with quattro bing. I culled all my non-maternity and doesn’t fit (I’m wearing way more non-maternity this pregnancy, because flowy tops are in and workout clothes streeeeetch just fine) and boxed it for later use or (ding ding ding) gave it away.
I assembled a small postpartum capsule as well, one small plastic container full of flowy tops, a pair of yoga pants, my skinnier maternity jeans, and the requisite postpartum unmentionables, so now I can just pull that down after baby arrives and avoid the heartache of trying on “normal” clothes too soon/continuing to live in blown out 10th month stretch shirts.
dim, poorly composed cell phone pictures are my medium.
The best part about curating our clothing content by far has been the kids’ wardrobes, though. I’m not completely heartless, so I allowed each of the boys to keep 3 superhero t-shirts, but other than that they have really cute, limited wardrobes for the summer consisting of a swimsuit and rash guard, 4-5 short sleeve tops (polos and t-shirts), 2 button down dress shirts (1 l/s 1 short), 5 pairs of shorts (cargo, bermuda, khaki, soccer), 2 pairs of jeans and 1 pair of khakis, and a pair of sandals, running shoes, and dress shoes, each. And that’s it. Everything else is either boxed up for another season, given away, or stashed for a future sibling of the male variety. (And I didn’t stash much at all, only about 1.5 plastic tubs worth.)
She was so sure she was helping.
Now when I send them to get dressed, they almost always come out looking just fine, if not a little pattern-confused. And I’m no longer peeling 2T Lightening McQueen jammie pants off the resident 4-year-old to coax him into a more Costco-approrpiate uniform. Because they’re gone. Cackle.
In short, my life has been changed, the change has been magical, and we’re all having a much better time of it when it’s time to tidy up.
End novella. Because it’s almost time to start primping for tonight.
